I wrote the following in March of this year:
Today I am going out on my own. In my wheelchair. On a special bus. And I am waiting for it to come. I don't mind telling you, I am absolutely terrified.
The woman from the 'MyBus' scheme has phoned and I've spoken to the driver as they can't find my address (common problem- new build estate!) and they were both absolutely lovely. But still, I am panicking about the whole thing.
Now, I consider myself to be a strong and capable woman, but I seem to have got myself into a right state about this.
Things that are worrying me- my neighbours will see me getting into the special bus in my wheelchair so I will be 'outed' as a disabled person, I might feel unwell and I'll be out by myself, my wheelchair might run out of batteries and I won't have anyone to help me, I might make myself very unwell by doing it at all and end up back in bed for days.
It's a big undertaking. It's the first time I've been out and about by myself in a long, long time. I have a knot in my stomach.
Please let it be ok.
Here I go!
Well since writing that post I am happy to report that I have now been on the MyBus a total of three times. I have gone to my local shopping centre twice and once to my local library. All three times went well, I felt pretty ropey (okay, VERY ropey), but I always do when I'm out and about anyway. Nothing terrible happened and the coffee I bought myself tasted better than any other coffee ever.
It tasted of the sweet, sweet taste of independence.
Well since writing that post I am happy to report that I have now been on the MyBus a total of three times. I have gone to my local shopping centre twice and once to my local library. All three times went well, I felt pretty ropey (okay, VERY ropey), but I always do when I'm out and about anyway. Nothing terrible happened and the coffee I bought myself tasted better than any other coffee ever.
It tasted of the sweet, sweet taste of independence.
That bit about the coffee. So spot on. I am incredibly happy for you and feel such a sense of pride. Seeing this huge milestone being smashed by you gives me so much hope for your future and mine. A huge HUGE well done to you. I hope you'll enjoy every minute of those little trips out and about xx
ReplyDeleteAmazing. I'm so glad you managed to overcome your fears and get out on your own. I was really self conscious about going out on my mobility scooter for the first time in front of neighbours but once I had done it I was so glad. x
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